NFL Wives and Girlfriends (WAGS)

08/20/14
 

Brandon Lafell's Wife Kristen Lafell

 

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Brandon Lafell's wife Kristen Lafell was engaged to Brandon on February 10, 2013 and got married to him on April 12, 2014. How do I know this? I creepily looked him up on their corny wedding page. I also checked out the wedding gifts they were given through their registry, and man did they get a lot of high-class shit. Kristen is probably real happy with all the stuff they got.

There's a few things Brandon's wife Kristen had to get caught up on. First, Brandon has a kid with another chick, known by in the scientific community as homos babeus mamius (or a baby mama to the layperson). It's the same old story, folks. You've heard it before: athlete doesn't use rubber, girl has kid, girl owns the athlete for 18 years. In one report, Lafell shorted her payments amounting to $23,000 over the course of about a year. I'm sure Kristen has a very one-sided view of this situation. She's got to support her man, but seen through impartial eyes (like those of a judge) he's being a deadbeat.

Which leads us to another little incident that Brandon's wife Kristen must have had a laugh about. When Brandon (who had kind of been sucking for the Panthers) got signed to the Patriots, he made some comments on Twitter that irked a lot of Panther fans. He said something to the effect of "I'm really psyched to be playing with Tom Brady cuz he's sick, and he's way better than the Panthers QB." A lot of people with no lives figured it was worthwhile to bitch at him, so he "retired" from Twitter for a month. Again, I'm curious what Kristen would have said to him about the thing. If she cared at all, which she likely did not, she should have told him "dude you're kind of a bonehead."


 

Fred Jackson's Wife Danielle Jackson

 

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Fred Jackson's wife Danielle Jackson currently holds the record for most pictures uploaded of children. This is a lady who likes to take pictures of her kids. She and Fred have four of them, and it's clear she's very much into the being-a-mother thing. It also looks like she's free and clear of any baby mama drama from Fred. No alimony or child support on the side.

Fred himself is looking like a nice pickup in fantasy football land. I'm not sure if all the teams have already been decided (since I myself do not partake in the rabbit hole that is fantasy football) but I do know that Fred and CJ Spiller combine for a powerful and run-centric offense. Fred's wife Danielle seems to really be digging life with her little ones while Fred pounds the turf. She's also really happy about the contract extension he's signed. It's going to keep him on the Bills for another couple years and pay some hefty diaper fees since they've just popped out a new kid. Danielle took a picture of Fred with the kids hanging out reading the contract extension just before he signed it.

Since Fred's the oldest running back in the NFL, he'll be considering upping his television game pretty soon. He already has The Fred Jackson Show, a local Buffalo football program. I've watched some of it. It's pretty low-key but Fred does a decent job of hosting it. He doesn't have the slick late night polish of someone like Jimmy Kimmel, but the show serves it's purpose: which is to give the Buffalo football fans some extra stuff to watch and think about. I kind of wonder if wife Danielle has appeared on the show. I really doubt it, but I bet she's been in the audience before. Fred may be working up to an ESPN analyst gig.

08/16/14
 

Paul Posluszny's Wife Elizabeth Posluszny

 

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Paul Posluszny's wife Elizabeth Posluszny has been rockin' and rollin' with "Paws" since they both attended Penn State. She was there to get a major in French, and he was there to get a major in Smashing Into Dudes. No, he actually did finish up a bachelor's in finance, but I don't seem him going to work for a Manhattan hedge fund any time soon.

Paul's new wife Elizabeth went on to get a master's in Education from the University of Buffalo. So she's a teacher now. The little tykes who all have crushes on her in the classroom get bummed out when they see the giant hulk she married. Posluszny's neck is in the same ballpark as Elizabeth's waist. According to Wikipedia, the couple twice postponed their honeymoon to Bora Bora. The first time was due to the NFL season starting, and the second time was because Paul went and got himself picked for the Pro Bowl. Alas, when they finally did make it down to the wonderful isle of Bora Bora (near Tahiti) they lapped up the tropical sunshine and drank Pina Coladas 'til luau time. If you're curious about the climate of their honeymoon paradise, Bora Bora's lowest average temperature all year is in July, and it is 82.6 degrees. Elizabeth went and got herself a tan.

Earning a Pro Bowl spot for Paul was a hard-fought battle. He's been in the league since 2007, and this was his first trip to the Bowl. His wife Elizabeth, though slightly put off at having to postpone Bora Bora time, was amply proud of Paul after his 3 sacks and 162 tackles. If you think about it, does it strike you as a little odd that they'd pick Bora Bora as a destination when they already live in Jacksonville? I've been to Jacksonville, and although it gets lower than 82, it's got a pretty solid climate.