Cleveland Browns Wives and Girlfriends (WAGS)

08/29/15

Joe Thomas' wife Annie Thomas


Joe Thomas' wife Annie Thomas married him back in 2007 after about six months of being engaged. They're still doing all the same stuff now that they were doing back then. This guy's still only 30 years old, and they were married when they were both 23. He's still blocking dudes, and she's still coaching girls basketball. They were married in the beautiful city of Madison, Wisconsin. I've been there, and I love it. There were around 350 guests at the wedding, according to Elegant Wedding Mag. The magazine says his first impression of her was that she was beautiful, and her first impression of him was that he was huge. It lists their favorite thing to do together as "just sitting down on the couch and talking. Both of our schedules are very hectic."

The couple met at the University of Wisconsin while they were both students. If you've never read stories about how athletes meet their girlfriends and wives, then I'll let you know this is roughly how a third of them end up getting hitched. She came into the football training room to get her ankle taped up, and Joey-boy was there. He invited her to a cookout that he and his roommate were hosting for other athletes. Joe Thomas' wife Annie Thomas is now the assistant coach at Cleveland State. They've also got a young daughter whom they named Logan.

Annie was a color commentator for the Wisconsin girl's basketball team for about a year at some point. I don't know exactly how she transitioned into assistant coaching responsibilities at Cleveland State. Neither Annie nor Joe are are too hot for social media, and since Joe has been with the Browns his entire career, Annie probably figured it was a good idea to put down some roots in the coaching community. Joe's contract is worth about $43 million, by the way, so they don't have to worry about finances any time soon.

02/28/15

Jim Brown's Wife Monique Brown


Jim Brown's wife Monique Brown was apparently threatened with murder by Brown in 1999, but she later recanted the statement. Mr. Brown has a long history of allegations and disturbances centered around violence towards women. The debate whether the NFL should reconsider its relationship with Jim Brown has been brought up recently after the Ray Rice incident. Considering that he's one of the greatest pro athletes ever and that he's an old man now, I'd say it's unlikely the NFL will change anything.

Jim Brown's wife Monique Brown did not know him when he was a skull-splitting force of nature in the NFL of the 1960's. He would basically run over people and get at least 5 yards every single time he touched the football.

Monique was 25 years old when her then 63 year-old husband apparently threatened to "snap her neck" in an argument they had in the Hollywood Hills. Monique also told the police Brown had smashed her car with a shovel. Monique later claimed that she was angry at Jim Brown for cheating on her and wanted to "provoke some type of response." She had told police that Brown had choked her, given her a black eye, and stood over her at one time with a metal spear.

Brown later was sentenced to a 6-month jail sentence and served less than four months at Ventura County Jail. It's anyone's guess what Jim Brown's wife Monique Brown actually thought of the prison sentence. For me, I realize that Brown is a famous NFL star and actor, but the guy seriously creeps me out. I can't understand why any intelligent woman would go anywhere near this guy except because of fame and money. He threw a woman off a balcony in 1968. Of course, she denied it afterwards because Brown seems to be able to find the women who will blame themselves for getting beat up. Seriously, you "slipped off the balcony?"

03/20/15 (Updated)

Josh Gordon's Girlfriend Jenna Shea


Josh Gordon's girlfriend she is not. Josh Gordon's call girl or Josh Gordon's escort Jenna Shea used his recent media exposure for getting suspended as an opportunity to raise her media profile. Though "raise" is a relative term as it applies to the internet. I'm not here to sit on a high horse and say I'm morally superior to anyone. I'm just pointing out the facts.

Jenna is a high-end call girl and escort. I'm not sure what else to call her because she sleeps with men for money. She's also slept with a ton of famous rappers like Fabolous and 'Lil Wayne. She's also taken it upon herself to rate their package sizes (apparently Fabolous was the winner). She's slept with James Harden after she was paid $20,000 to "hang out." She denied this in an interview on YouTube, but everyone seems so darn sure of it for some reason. Hmm, why would that be, Mr. Harden?

Jenna's picture of Josh featured him when his tattoo was unfinished, implying that it was awhile ago. But then she posted another picture of a 1st class plane ticket to Cleveland from about a week ago. She deleted the picture from her Instagram, but not before everyone screen-captured it. Well, I'm not sure if this is even bad news for Gordon compared to his year-long suspension. I mean, dang that is a long suspension for smoking some grass. I'm pretty sure the rule will be changed within a year or two, as it really belongs in another century, but there's nothing to be done for Josh now, and he mine as well buy Jenna another ticket to Cleveland to do some hanging out.

I also sort of wonder if it's hypothetically possible to go on a date with a professional escort like Jenna without a transaction being involved. Like, what if she actually prefers dating bookish nerds as opposed to millionaire rap stars and athletes?