Lebron Creeps Jordan Poyer’s Girlfriend Rachel Bush

Jordan Poyer's Girlfriend Rachel Bush- Instagram @rachelbush

This trend of the mega-butt temptress shows no signs of slowing down thanks to professional direct-messengers like LeBron James. Jordan Poyer’s girlfriend Rachel Bush recently received a message from ‘Bronny, and it went a little something like this (are you ready?): “Hey what’s up!” Seriously, that’s your opening line, King? I mean, I guess you don’t necessarily have to stand out and be creative when you’re the King, but come on. We all know you’re…

Joe Thomas’ wife Annie Thomas

Joe Thomas' wife Annie Thomas

Joe Thomas’ wife Annie Thomas married him back in 2007 after about six months of being engaged. They’re still doing all the same stuff now that they were doing back then. This guy’s still only 30 years old, and they were married when they were both 23. He’s still blocking dudes, and she’s still coaching girls basketball. They were married in the beautiful city of Madison, Wisconsin. I’ve been there, and I love it. There…

Jim Brown’s Wife Monique Brown

Jim Brown’s wife Monique Brown was apparently threatened with murder by Brown in 1999, but she later recanted the statement. Mr. Brown has a long history of allegations and disturbances centered around violence towards women. The debate whether the NFL should reconsider its relationship with Jim Brown has been brought up recently after the Ray Rice incident. Considering that he’s one of the greatest pro athletes ever and that he’s an old man now, I’d…

Josh Gordon’s Girlfriend Jenna Shea

Josh Gordon's Girlfriend Jenna Shea

Josh Gordon’s girlfriend she is not. Josh Gordon’s call girl or Josh Gordon’s escort Jenna Shea used his recent media exposure for getting suspended as an opportunity to raise her media profile. Though “raise” is a relative term as it applies to the internet. I’m not here to sit on a high horse and say I’m morally superior to anyone. I’m just pointing out the facts. Jenna is a high-end call girl and escort. I’m…

Ben Tate’s Girlfriend Tasha Malek

Ben Tate's girlfriend Tasha Malek - Twitter

Ben Tate’s girlfriend Tasha Malek is the mother of Ben’s child and an expert selfie-taker. Tasha attended the University of Alabama and graduated in 2008, and it’s believed that the two met through college connections. Tasha is also known for a few other things in the trashcan department: one is being a cast member whom was kicked off the show “Bad Girls Club,” which is a Mary Ellis-Bunim show (the creator of The Real World)….

Joe Haden’s Wife Sarah Haden

Joe Haden's wife Sarah Haden - Twitter

Joe Haden’s wife Sarah Haden changed her last name to his, as is the custom here for some reason. Seems arbitrary but whatever. Her former last name was Mahmoodshahi, which is way cooler sounding than Haden. It’s pronounced “Mahk-mood-shah-hee” as compared to “Hay-din.” No offense to Joe, but that’s a trade-down. Sarah and Joe were recently featured on one of those garish Wedding magazines for their wedding. It featured 19,000 square feet of white carpet…

Johnny Manziel’s Girlfriend Colleen Crowley

Johnny Manziel's girlfriend Colleen Crowley - Twitter

Ladies, you need a written confirmation from Johnny F-Bombs to use the word “girlfriend” when speaking about your relation to him. We’re generally intelligent enough to infer that if you take a girl to venue after venue, event after event, game after game, carnival after carnival, and eating contest after eating contest, she’s your girlfriend. However, Johnny Manziel’s “girlfriend” Colleen Crowley has not yet gotten the paperwork in her mailbox from Johnny’s people. She’s your…

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