NBA Wives and Girlfriends (WAGS)

06/17/14
 

Nerlens Noel's Girlfriend Jordan Walsh

 

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UPDATE 08/15/2014: Nerlens. You ARE the father.

In the evolving saga of the woman once known between Nerlens Noel, Nerlens Noel's baby Mama Jamie, and the 14 month old child alleged to be Noel's, we have an answer. Noel, is the biological father of the 14 month old after DNA test confirmed their ties. No word on a response from and Nerlens Noel's girlfriend Jordan Walsh.

Court documents filed state that Noel has had limited contact with his son, and is relinquishing primary custody to the child's mother, Jamie. Noels is seeking a "minimal level of child support," which you know, since a top 10 NBA pick doesn't really have expendable income to spend on his friggin kid or anything.

Good luck to Jamie, good luck to Jordan, and good luck to this poor kid. Noel, way to be a man.


Nerlens McMerlins be twirlin's and unfurlin's. So the guy's got a wacky name; just having a bit of fun with it. Where to begins withs youngs Nerlens? Well, Nerlens Noel's girlfriend Jordan Walsh may or may not still be with him, but there's other more "dramatic" controversies at hand. I'm talking about some good old fashioned baby mama drama (with a girlfriend before Jordan Walsh entered the picture).

It was reported just yesterday by TMZ that Nerl has stopped child support of $10,000 per month to a woman named Jamie because he wants to make sure his baby is actually his. It started out when a mysterious girl named Jamie claimed her baby sprung forth from The Nerl, and then he signed an affidavit admitting that he was the father of the baby. He then committed pay the amount each month but then stopped, counter-claiming that he didn't understand what he had signed previously. This is your classic BMD, people. It's got all the right ingredients: backpeddling, confusion, and frownin' baby mamas with expensive pacifiers.

Nerlens is known far and wide as Mr. Flat Top, which adds an inch or two to his 6'11" height (7'1" flat top included). Incidentally, flat tops do not increase powers of logic and common sense. Nerlens had a good year at Kentucky, averaging 10.5 points, 9.5 rebounds, 2 steals and a most impressive 4.4 blocks per game. I suppose NBA scouts revered his athleticism, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say picking him 6th overall was foolhardy. I know, you think I'm crazy, but he hasn't proven anything yet (aside from he can block and steal the basketball in college), and an ACL tear is extremely serious. No one knows if it'll hobble him permanently, which does happen. That's not to say he won't rehabilitate and be able to get on the court, but it is to say that players can lose a step and play conservatively after ACL rips- permanently. I hope he proves me wrong though. He's already getting paid $3.1 million which, again, I think is ridiculous, but who cares what I think.

As for this Jordan Walsh chick: she's a confirmed NFL and NBA mega-groupie, as reported by thedirty.com. Nerlens has been seen and photographed kicking it with her in limousines and couches. I'd say the chances that they're "boyfriend and girlfriend" or "going steady" in the classical 1950's wholesome sense are about the same as the chances the Sixers will win a championship next season, but it still helps to know a bit about what's going on in Nerlens' World. I'm going to write out a legal document for 10 grand a month, bring it to a Sixers game, and then tell him I want his autograph.

06/09/14
 

James Johnson's wife Callie Johnson

 

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James Johnson's wife Callie Johnson was allegedly hit during a domestic dispute Saturday morning, which ultimately led to the Grizzlies forward arrest and charges filed.

The two began arguing after leaving Beale Street in Memphis around 2am. Johnson was arrested and booked into County Jail shortly after 4:00am Saturday morning, and charged with domestic assault after allegedly hitting and choking his wife. Johnson initially left after the argument, but returned home to find police interviewing his wife. Callie told police that both had been drinking, and in a police affidavit, accused Johnson of punching a hole in a bathroom door, where she was hiding.

James and Callie Johnson were married in July, 2012 and have one daughter together. If these accusations turn out to be true, it's another in a long line of domestic assaults throughout professional sports. It's a sad and alarming trend that shows no signs of slowing down.

The Grizzlies only official statement thus far was to say they were gathering information and had no further statements. Johnson was in court Monday where he pled not guilty.

06/07/14
 

Steven Adams' girfriend Kayla Kiriau

 

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Ah, New Zealand, land of giants, orcs, hobbits, and large athletic centers!

Steven Adams girlfriend Kayla Kiriau has struggled to climb the ​basketball ​heights like he has. ​Steven was able to leave New Zealand and land in Oklahoma. So...that's...good. ​

A moderately talented basketballer herself, she started at Sheridan Junior College and then transferred to Point Park in 2013. If you’re wondering, Point Park is a college outside of Pittsburgh. She transferred there from Sheridan in Wyoming in order to be closer to Adams, who was attending Pitt. He then ​got drafted and signed in 2013 by the Thunder for about 2,000,000 bucks a year, but that’ll climb to about 3,000,000 by the time 2016 rolls around. Adams has a pretty interesting background.

His father, Sid Adams, was a navy guy who settled in New Zealand and seemingly attempted to set the world record for most children fathered in the country, having eighteen kids with five different women. Spread the seed far and wide, Sid.
​He died when Steven was thirteen, and he had difficulty without his father, but he got through it.

Another really cool fact about Steven is his sister is basically the greatest woman shotputter that ever lived. Her name is Valerie Kasanita Adams. Look her up, seriously. She is a shot-putting machine. 6’4”, 250 pounds, charismatic, and a collector of gold medals of all stripes. She has two Olympics golds in shot-putting, and she pretty much wins any competition she enters. That’s what you get when you’re Sid Adams’ kid. According to the Pittsburgh Post Gazette, sons of ​Sid ​Adams average 6’9” and females 6’. Here’s to hoping that Stephen puts those genes to good use and improves his numbers up from the 3 PPG and 4 RPG that he’s averaging. He’s only 20 so he’s got a lot of time.

​​​ The Eye of Sauron is watching everything he does.