Player Wives & Girlfriends

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By now, pretty much everyone is aware that Melky Cabrera was suspended for 50 games for failing a drug test with elevated testosterone. In a rare and somewhat surprising twist, Melky was quick to acknowledge his error and accept responsibility for his actions by releasing the following statement released through the Player's Union:

“My positive test was the result of my use of a substance I should not have used. I accept my suspension under the Joint Drug Program and I will try to move on with my life. I am deeply sorry for my mistake and I apologize to my teammates, to the San Francisco Giants organization and to the fans for letting them down.”

Now, while Melky is quick to stand up and own his error, let us offer up another admittedly ridiculous but still possible explanation.

Shortly after Melky won the 2012 All Star Game MVP, he became a father yet again. Melky Cabrera's girlfriend Johanna Medina gave birth to Melianny the couple's first daughter (and third child overall for Melky). Our best research indicates that Johanna resides in Florida, and that their children are with her. Could it be that Johanna was just completely overwhelmed and drugged him with some extra juice in his juice to get him to stay home and help around the house? Melky cannot be with the team for the rest of the season and first 5 games of the playoffs, so she would have 2 straight months of help around the house. At most he'd have to go back to work for another month, but then he's home again for another 4 or 5 months.

OK, so if you haven't left by now, you've probably figured out that we don't know a ton about Johanna, but at least we had an excuse to write about her. Congrats to Johanna on the new child and for getting Melky home again...